All thoughtful, logical comments.
Now all you need is luck. I drive a lot of miles so I try to buy a pre-owned BMW coming off a lease. I did about what you did, and what Robert did, back in 2003. Bought a 2001. Still looks and drives (almost) like new. Doesn't burn a drop of oil, transmission issues, such as jerking, come and go, but its fine for now. When I got to about 80,000 I realized how much it had depreciated and thought there was no reason to start the meter over again. My former car was a 750. I kept it until it 265,000 miles, and should have given it away at 250,000, as I spent $13,000 on it the last year, mostly the ex-wife's fault. (When the electric radiator fan quits working in August and the temperature gauge is pegged on hot and all the warning lights are on, steam coming out from under the hood, you don't go sit in a McDonald's drive through with the air on.) Before that I had a 735 that I put 185,000 miles on with no problems.
I now have 190,000 miles on the X5 with no real issues. Window regulators. But with Robert's excellent postings, I will do the next repair myself. Even if I eventually need a new transmission its still more cost effective than trading.
Highlanders are very reliable, conservative cars. Whenever I see one its in the left lane going just under the speed limit. And if you had been in one when you had your recent avoidance, you might be shiny side down in a ditch. I just can't see driving anything but an X5, but that's just me.